IVF Series: 12

We received our transfer schedule yesterday. It’s just as intense as the retrieval schedule. I had a moment of breakdown after seeing it. I think this was the first time I actually broke down and cried about the process. In that moment I reached my breaking point. This whole process has been so overwhelming and I guess I thought the worst of it was over, yet here we are. Another full month of intensity. I would like to think that I have been incredibly strong this whole time but this is challenging even for me. Even though it has been peaceful for the most part, that doesn’t take away just how emotionally draining this has been. In total, with the Covid setback, this will be 8 months long. That’s kind of a long time to be going through such a grueling event. I had never imagined when people mention IVF that it was like this. We received a binder full of information and I have read all 100 pages of it cover to cover and I still feel confused. I thought this transfer was only like 2 medications; no injections. But instead, it’s actually 7 medications including injections. Now, my anxiety with Covid is back on the rise because of the disclaimer they put out. If I come into contact with it then they will cancel my treatments. I am back at work and doing my best to maintain healthy habits but there is still that anxiety I have. Brock and I have remained staying at home on my days off; not running to stores or hanging out with friends etc. I know I need to try to enjoy the IVF process…....maybe? Should I be enjoying this process? Or can I just want it to be over? I know I am in the homestretch. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. This has been a long, dark tunnel and I never thought I would see the end. Yet, here we are. The patch that I needed had been back ordered and was out of stock almost everywhere else. After much calling back and forth between multiple pharmacies to track this product down, I was able to find a pharmacy that had just enough. However, it was about a 45 minute drive. I had called the pharmacy beforehand just to make sure my prescription was there but turns out my doctor sent in the wrong brand name which needed to be corrected before I could pick it up. After I had already spent almost 2 weeks in this chaotic mess trying to get this medication, you could naturally assume at this point I was very frustrated. I am just glad I did not drive 45 minutes only to not be able to get it because my doctor is an idiot. After another day of getting that sorted out, I was finally able to go pick up my medication. I had called the morning before I picked it up just to make sure it was still in stock because it had been previously mentioned to me that this stuff was selling like hot cakes. Thankfully, it was still in stock so I jumped in my car and drove there! When I got there, I had given my name and the cashier said, “It looks like it didn’t go through the insurance.” (I had already known that this one was of the few meds that my insurance didn’t cover so I was okay paying full price.) I said, “Yeah, I know. That’s okay.” He looks at me and says, “It’s kind of expensive.” ($500) I replied, “Yeah…..that’s okay.” At this point this guy is just not giving up. He goes, “Have you tried Good Rx? It’s a coupon.” I looked at this cashier who had my oh so coveted meds in his hand in which my mind was just so focused like Smeagol from Lord of the Rings who just needed his “precious.” Finally I looked at him and said, “No, this is just a temporary medication that I need for my IVF cycle. This med is actually discontinued, out of stock everywhere and I have spent 2 weeks and 4 different pharmacies to track this down so really at this point I would pay $1,000 for it.” He looked at me and said, “Oh…...ok.” Needless to say, He gave me my meds with no further questions and I was on my way.

And for now,

Xoxo