IVF Series: 3

I completed all of the necessary testing. And the results came back. In that conversation we discussed the next steps. The next step is a short little IVF class where they give you a bunch of information, timelines, etc. that is specific to your journey. And by short I mean it was like 2 hours long with a presentation in which I felt like I was in Health class again. I also will need to start taking a form of birth control this next cycle. I think the birth control is to kind of shut things down and get it ready for the actual process. We decided to do some rearranging in our upstairs bedrooms. The rearranging was originally just a thought and I was trying to imagine the shift in our house. However, after I briefly mentioned it to Brock, he was ready to move things right away. Just the thought of moving stuff brought triggers to my mind and tears to my eyes. I had mentioned in a previous post that I had at one point set up a nursery and taking that down was very heartbreaking for me. This time, we conjoined “fun rooms” and now have a room dedicated for a nursery. I have a few small baby things in there, but for the most part I have left the room as more of a temporary storage place. I think leaving it in this condition for now is the most beneficial for me. I am very hopeful in this process, however, I do remain guarded. For me, these are the kind of steps that I take to balance my emotions and reality. Here is a picture from my ultrasound that was just to make sure everything visually looked ok. Obviously I was not pregnant in this picture, nor did I think I was. However, I wanted you to see what I have seen in all of my countless ultrasounds. Emptiness.

And for now,

Xoxo